She was there I suppose
The moment that i was born
For as long as i can remember
She was my companion
My solace my comfort
Stopping me from touching a hot stove
Or skipping school with friends
I don’t understand when she took over
From stopping me from doing dangerous things
To making me think twice before i did anything
I suppose I lost my natural instinct
Instead I listened to her
Drowned everything else out
Even when they were begging to be heard
Anxiety is a weird thing isn’t it ?
As an innocent child it is just fear
But I wonder if
As I grew
She grew too
From fear to anxiety,
We simply fail to see the lines anymore
And ignore all other feelings
And I suppose fear comes with anxiety
Because anxiety makes you scared
Scared to go out
Scared to talk
Sometimes even scared to breathe.
Sometimes she’s so loud in my head
I wonder if she’s my brain now
I feel nothing but what she dictates
I’ve given her total control now
I hope one day I’ll outgrow this
Be able to put a stop to her
And listen to the other voices in my head.
But for now i think it’s safest i listen to her
What do I know besides her ?
I have felt nothing but her
For the better half of my life.