It felt like a dream
When we first began to speak
It was like finding a dream
My dream
As the minutes turned to hours
The hours turned to days
And days turned to weeks
About three weeks
You were so sweet
Saying I\'m sorry
I have been chasing a different fantasy
I still want to
Be a part of your dream
Instantly I lock down
My heart losing yet another shard
I realize again
Too late
Why you hold your cards to your chest
Why you do not allow people to see
Feel
Know all of you
Until you are certain
They are going to stay there for you
\"This is what happens\"
I hear their words over and over
I understand that
But it doesn\'t bring back the time
The hope
The butterflies
Or
The time
With every failure
I trust less and less
Of love
That it\'s actually real
Is it?
Those that have it say it is
What about us who do not?
How do we find it?
I try to be my authentic self
But all I do
Is scare away
Anybody who might
Come my way
Perhaps I should put her on a shelf
Lock her up
Somewhere she can not get hurt
Keep her away
Until I will know she is safe
Because this world
Is dark and brutal
My shining, optimistic eyes
Are slowly losing their shine
They say it is harder to be kind
Well of course
This world wars us down till there\'s nothing left
Of who we were
I used to always find the bright side
The good things
I am beginning to become blind
For I cannot see that beautiful glow
Of love that I believed I would find
Maybe it\'s true
I will end up drifting through this world
Nothing but a stepping stone
For others
A shiny pebble that catches your eye for a moment but then you no longer care for
The hope I carry like a precious treausure
Is beginning to seem dull and unreal
As of now I am lost
I lost what I hoped for
Don\'t know how to get it back
How do I get her back?
With every setback
I harden more and more
I just wanna be myself
But maybe for others
Myself is not who I should be anymore
I will become who I feared to be
Hardened
Angry
Defensive
Put on a show
Until I find somebody who could maybe know
Who I really am
Love her for who she is
Without wanting what the world does
I had a dream
Now it\'s gone
I hope your happy with your new fantasy
But just so you know
I lied when I said we could be just
\'friends\'