for the longest time you tricked me into thinking it was my fault
whether it was truly you or my child brain I do not know for sure
I accepted it and thought it was my fault because I didn\'t stop it
but I truly couldn\'t have because my response was to freeze
that allowed you to continue as I physically couldn\'t stop it
they say my brain showed up for me, but it really didn\'t help
I pray and wish that I would have been able to run or fight
but that isn\'t how my mind worked, I fear you knew that
I fear you knew I was a quiet and timid child oh I fear
if you knew that then it was more than just deliberate
not only was it monstrous and vile but devil-like
and now I know its not my fault I did what I did
the way my body responded I couldn\'t control
and that was not my fault.