Dear Younger Me,
I see you there,
small, shut in the world’s shadow,
a child in a heavy cloak,
carrying the weight of secrets
meant for parents,
but locked in your heart.
When the sun fades,
the house grows louder—
the clink of bottles,
your dad’s distant roar,
your mind whispers to run,
but where would your small feet take you?
Out the door?
And into the dark?
Or,
to care for your sister
to build a fortress of laughter
to keep her safe from the storms.
Sweet girl, you wore a smile,
painted bright against the gray,
a mask so perfect
nobody could see the cracks,
each laugh echoing in the empty rooms,
a soft shield wrapped around your heart
to keep her joy alive.
How many nights did you cry,
silent sobs swallowing dreams,
pillowing the sorrow in your heart
while shadows danced on walls?
With every tear, a letter
never sent to the sky,
carved with hurt,
each drop like a tiny star.
You were the mother she needed
even when you were just a child,
changing diapers for a doll dressed in love,
playing house with the truth,
but never really knowing
what it felt like to be held
like some secret that should have mattered.
I wish I could gather you
in my arms,
whisper that you are more than the darkness,
more than the silent screams that echo,
a survivor cloaked in resilience,
learning to walk in a world
where love was a stranger,
where trust felt like a glass
shattering on the floor.
Yet still, you danced through the pain,
while the memories lurked,
the shadows of betrayal,
you held tight to hope,
a flickering candle fighting
against the night.
Life tried to teach you,
but not in gentle strokes,
instead in cold lessons
that broke the innocence,
and yet, dear heart—
in every hug you gave,
in every kindness shown,
you ignited a truth,
that love can be built,
not just found,
in pieces stitched together
by the hands that learned
even through hurt.
So keep that heart open,
you did what you could,
and you are more than your past.
Keep breathing, little one,
because all those wounds fade
to create strength,
in the tapestry of our story,
you find your voice,
your truth.
With all my love,
Older You