There\'s a dark room in which I lay
It’s pitch black, and you can see almost nothing
But I know I’m sleeping in some sort of hallway
How? Because there’s doors with little square windows
And beyond those doors there are people of all walks of life
I rise from my fetal position on the ground
And peek through the little windows
My eyes scan the room the best they can
The center of my eye sees humanity
All emotions
And all things
But in my peripheral vision I glance back at the darkness
To which I’ve always stayed
I like to knock on the doors and see if there is an answer
Sometimes I see them shut off all the lights and head to the corners of the room
Sometimes they open the door but their body is a boulder that I can’t get past
And so I have only now a rectangle of humanity to look at now instead of a square
Sometimes they open the door and let me in and give me a goodie bag as if I was just a leaving guest at a party
When they close the door after I can barely see what I got
But I’m thankful anyways
Sometimes they open the door and let me stay for a while
They ask me about the outside, they didn’t even know someone lived out there!
They give me compliments and always have a sense of hospitality
But it’s clear that their love for me can be easily discarded
Sometimes rooms are filled with hate
Filled with people who like to make loud noises from inside to disturb my sleep
And when I walk in the dark I can hear their taunts
But I can’t make out the words
Or what they mean.
They’re not perfect
But these people all have a room
Even if it’s just a tiny room with one person
It’s still a room
It always will be
I have the darkness of the hallway in which I try to play but I am forever stunted
The squeaks of my shoes against the floor give me paranoia
And I always bump into doors and bulletin boards
So I almost always just lay there
But suddenly, I started to see the fluorescent lights turn on
They beam and they shine
Until all of the hallway is lit up
I scramble and as I get up I look down to the floor
All the stickers, the scraps, the toys, and the knick knacks I had found around
or kept from a room’s goodie bags
They all were there
And it created a sculpture! A masterpiece!
But I looked around again
All the light in the rooms was gone.
So I rush to find my lovers, haters, and friends
I rush them out into the hallway where we all dance in excitement, we can all share this hallway together now!
No more awaiting approval
No more cries
No more isolation
And then right before I go to embrace my friends,
I see the blinding flash
And it all comes down
I wake up on the ground
Even when I’ve waited for a spark
The fantasy had withered away
I still see the dark