outside the drawn floral curtains
in the scary dark night
a door closed
over and over
muffled whispers
of dad’s voice talking to
uncle phil
followed by sounds of
spades digging
on ground hardened by frost
striking on flint
grating on my mind
over and over
sharp stones in an untamed
garden in the cold of
winter
the dog had been sick
our fluffy black and white pup
my ears strained
what were they doing
and then
the penny registered
in my eight year old brain
dropping like a dead weight
hurting my heart
with horror
i listened to that scraping
and bedding down of soil
when i was unable to
shed a single tear
hiding under the counter pane
trembling
a small leaf buried under
a mountain of sadness