How’d I stop my heartbeat without getting to say goodbye
I remember me no more
If I’m to write a memo
I’d have nothing to scribble down
I lost myself in a shipwreck
It’s hard to find me back to me
I did drive myself there but now it’s tough to compass my way back
I lost myself trying to be a “human”
Nay, I’m better off as a mild feathered “bird”
I thought switching was as the “head” and “tail”
Snap! And there’s a switch from one side to the other
But it turns out I’m neither of that
How can’t I be what I was made for
How’s it difficult to return to your golden path after switching lanes
It’s hard to get through when you’ve been buried more than you should be
It’s hard to get along with your type of species when you learnt to adapt to a higher ranking
I wish for a second life but it’s hard to get it back
My frozen brain and thawed heart are in two different worlds now
How helpless could my vessels be, not to help me just this time
How’d did I even end here?
Why does the dead feel she’s not where she deserves?
I have met lots of dead people
I just didn’t know I could be one of them
I walked a milestone and now I feel it’s worth nothing
I want myself back yet I don’t look prepared
Dear finder of living selves
A compass to myself I ask from you
I’m heavily drenched in the ocean of dirt
How much water do I need to be clean?
Everyone’s left when I needed ‘em the most
I’m a whole messed up maze
Looking for my way back to my living existence………