I have a strong interest in exploring narratives and films that examine the identities, personalities, backgrounds, and lifestyles of serial killers. My interest isn’t driven by a fascination with violence and horror, which often evoke themes of darkness, fear, and despair. Instead, I enjoy investigating the human psyche, psychology, and the intrinsic nature of individuals guided by instincts and reasoning. I am also intrigued by how the mind cultivates happiness or can lead to destruction. My curiosity about the complex dark side of human nature developed from my anxiety, which obscured my judgment and trapped me in a cycle of fear and stress.
Moreover, when my first child faced depression, he endured a challenging period at the age of thirteen that lasted several years. During this time, my educated yet harsh husband, who was selfish and controlling, imposed strict rules regarding mental health.
I began exploring both my son and myself by analysing the complexities of various individuals, including my husband\'s brilliant yet troubled mind. By learning about my husband\'s childhood struggles—having been born and raised in a small home by an uneducated mother and a self-taught father as the second oldest of thirteen children—he endured significant social and familial neglect, backlash, and psychological deprivation regarding family life, support, and closeness. He became fixated on wealth accumulation without grasping its true meaning, striving to provide well for himself and his family. He often said, \"Every time I spend money, I fear becoming poor.\" At that time, I found it difficult to empathise with him. I wanted him to see life from a different viewpoint and learn how to engage with me and our two children. However, I did not realise that reshaping one\'s mindset requires substantial challenges, sacrifices, acknowledgement, and courage to shift towards a more positive perspective. Gaining insights into my husband\'s mental health struggles helped me confront the underlying causes of my cognitive challenges. Through persistent research and study, I gradually came to understand the origins and foundations of acceptance, as well as the intricate process of healing.
In the course of my exploration, as I endeavoured to remedy my problems, I discovered that the mind is an extraordinary instrument—capable of healing, empowering, and even causing devastation. It plays a vital role in shaping our identity and physical existence, but it can also succumb to illness. Frequently, trauma, adversity, abuse, prolonged neglect, severe deprivation, and lack of guidance during childhood contribute to mental health issues.
Through extensive study, personal inquiry, and a profound exploration of my interactions with those affected by mental illness, I have realised that the mind can nurture a loving family, cultivate a peaceful society, and repair the fractured aspects of history. On the other hand, it also possesses the capacity to become a deadly weapon for neglect, abuse, even murder, crime, and destruction. My investigation into the human mind has deepened my curiosity about how a nurturing environment, characterised by caring parents and a supportive social and educational setting, fosters healthier minds. Thus, I firmly believe that a strong foundation in childhood leads to a healthier adulthood. While challenging and dark situations can negatively affect a person\'s well-being, it is ultimately their childhood experiences that shape their future.
Shahla Latifi
June 2025