I punish myself
constantly.
I remind myself that no,
that I am nobody.
Silence.
I wait.
Yesterday, son of rigor.
Today, father of patience.
I am aware
that the day of disaster is not mine.
The guilt of the cycle hurts me more.
I did it again.
I destroyed everything.
To the point of begging them to stay.
Don\'t leave me alone with myself.
I\'m in danger!
Spilled blood,
tears, and madness.
The murderer escaped,
the gun, in his hand,
says no more.
I\'ll trade you all my days for a little piece of paper
that says you forgive me.