Having a Bad day.
Today’s not a good day inside my crazy tormented head.
I spent the night tossing and turning in my unmade bed.
My body and head are reminding me how old i really am.
I feel pain everywhere today, I am an angry broken man
I am regularly irritable and impatient to the central core.
As I trip over the clothes that last night I left on the floor.
My head is full of anger and rage, I feel ready to explode.
The problem is what am I angry about I don\'t really know.
I won’t open the curtains to see the summer view outside.
I have so much fear and anxiety inside I just need to hide.
Only the negative is allocated space to be reside my head.
Constant growing imaginary thoughts of how to be dead.
I am thinking of things I would not like normally to think.
Try to dissolve my problems with another bottle of drink.
People I am angry with I am now getting the urge to kill.
Even though it’s clear this urge I would never truly fulfil.
I do try things to try to change all my negative thoughts.
Yet when they fail, I am banging my head against a door
I have many nights and days just like this to often before.
The only thing to be certain of, there will be many more.
There are 12 hours to go before the day comes to an end.
When tomorrow comes I know it will be the same again.
Nataiella (2025).