Please allow me to become a little vulnerable.
I know my problem.
I know my issue
I have tried to fight it, I’ve tried to focus on things above
But yet I’m still drowning
I refuse to lose hope
But I seek help and prayers.
You see, my maladaptive thoughts have become my reality
Well…fake reality
I run to my thoughts like a caffeineholic runs to coffee
They have become my “safe place,” but I’m in chains
How do I fix this?
Slowly, by slowly, I’ve become distant not only to God but even to the people I love.
I have so much I want to say, but can’t bring myself to
I feel alone and unseen
I want to burst and speak, but I can’t!
So I’m trying this way…
The feeling of needing help but not being able to ask
Having a family that loves you, yet you can’t bring you to love you
Needing to be with others but wanting to be alone
Wanting God but living for the world
Trapped in mind-full-of-sin.
I’ve been set free, but I\'m still living like a prisoner
I’ve started being quick to anger, so I’ve chosen to avoid others…
Help me, Lord!