MatPie

Fall

I long for a breath of air

Not compelled by society

Norms developed by old men

Stitched inside my brain

Like a tapeworm eating

Every part of my mind

Parents teaching their children

What it is and what nots

What\'s it like to live in the world

Not theirs not ours nothing else

 

Judgemental eyes all around me

Bringing generational broken wisdom

Controlling what we do and what we don\'t

Living in a bubble, an old fantasy

Clinging to what\'s left to tell

The world\'s dying from the burden of history

Of generational trauma and guilt of the living

Passing onto generation like a tag

Pressed upon my chest and my deeds

I am terrified of becoming just like them

Letting all their words crawl into my mouth

Begin to spit their words from my mouth

Leaves me breathless and in front of a mirror

 

I can\'t bear to live in a world

I wasn\'t meant to be in anyway

Am I the only one to feel this way?

Is there anyone else begging to go away?

At the edge of the world

I see the reflection of myself

Becoming who I wasn\'t mean to be

Clipped by the words of the past

The wicked snickering of the devil

In the distance taunting my life

I was destined to be laughed at

Spilling out words to taunt my existence

Jokes all around the table

With every side laughing at me

I spoke too fast

And they came wailing for more

I wish to die on the moon

No one would be able to notice

Only the shooting stars ever will

Let me be, let me be

I won\'t shut up until I am able to talk

Let me be, let me be

I am turning into raindrops

With a wild wind pushing me

To the sun where I am burning

Spinning spreading fire and flames

Vomiting flesh of my own

I\'m being cut to shreds like pigs

My body being crushed by my own blood

Pharmaceutical pills everywhere

Blood stained walls for you to live in

 

A fresh of air will come somehow

I will scream as I like

To let you know I am still alive

Living in my own skin

Always believing