she used to be my quiet
the space between my heartbeats
the reason i could breathe without thinking
everything i did
every move every word
it was always for her
or to her
or because of her
now she’s gone
and the air doesn’t fit right in my lungs anymore
people talk and laugh around me
but my body doesn’t know how to rest with them
it only ever learned her rhythm
she was my safe place
and now every room feels like a threat
i try to be okay
i try to keep up
but i’m so tired
so goddamn tired
my chest hums with this dull ache
and i can’t tell if i’m sad or just numb
sometimes i catch myself
reaching for her name
like it’s still supposed to save me
but all it does now
is remind me of the girl
who taught my body peace
and then took it with her when she left