Today we gather
Solemn and sincere
To honor a faithful friend
Who held us through the years.
Here lies the bed
Springs weary
Frame creaking
Mattress shaped like every dream we ever fell asleep chasing.
It carried our laughter
Our midnight thoughts
Our scrolling at 2 a.m
Our crumbs from snacks we swore we’d never eat in you
It bore the weight of heartbreaks
Headaches
Of lazy Sunday and mornings we refused to face.
Though its pillows flattened
Its blankets frayed
It never once complained about the life it supported.
So rest now, dear bed
Retired from your noble post
May you find peace in the great beyond
That mysterious realm of curbside pickup and bulk trash day.
We thank you for every soft landing
Every warm night
Every dream you cradled.
Goodnight, old friend
You’ve earned your final sleep