i am not afraid of
the dark anymore
i am more afraid
of the light
there is no fear to be found
where i can hide
stay quiet
shrink into the corners and
cease to exist
but in the light
i am embracing, arms open
the knowledge that i am easy to find
in the light, i
lay out all of my faults
bring the pretending to a halt
in the light, every pore
can be analysed
chastised, re-stylised
by eyes that do not have
even a flicker of a similar mind
i stand, in the dark
smiling
i look all around me
nod politely
adjust the collar of my dress
and wipe my hands down the front
remove all the mess
as i stare, into the abyss
i find a glitter, a shimmer
the peg of a guitar
catching the light
the thrum of a drum
trembling beneath my feet
singing strings
simple things
a soul entering the dark
with wavering wings
they play a song
my dad used to love
and i stare at the corner,
the edge of the stage
imagining him sat
still ripe in age
head tilted, eyes scanning
exciting, enchanting
smiling as the beat
syncs with his heart
and the singer
engrossed
doesn\'t notice the ghost
doesn\'t feel the stare
of a man, barely there
he runs his fingers along
the neck of his instrument
and continues to play
the lights
shining, blinding
glimmering with dust
exposing him entirely
in a promise of trust
they turn
from white, to blue
and green
a real-life reenactment
of the northern lights
i look at my father
and he is gone
this moment, existing
only within
the boundaries of his favourite song
i push through the crowd
reach the edge of the stage
and brush my hand along
the space he had stayed
empty
the audience applauds
the song so well-played
that for a moment, my brain
saw my father again
when the sun
kisses my face
the next morning
I sit by my window
eat a pint of ice cream
while listening again
and searching for his
beautiful face
i do not see it again
i realise, the light
where i am analysed
stylised
chastised
i am seen
i am a mixture of blue and green
i am breathing, openly
for all to see
i sit on the edge
of my stage
head tilted, eyes scanning
exciting, enchanting
smiling as i notice
the beat of my heart
i look in the mirror
see my father\'s face
in my own
and smile
we are only here
for a short while
while i breathe
i may as well
do it with style.
13:59pm - 01/02/26.