Yes, I\'m the guy who
Took so long to find out what Carpe Diem meant
That by the time I found out
It was night-time and no day left to seize - Doh!
And I\'m the guy who
Obeyed that notice:
\'This Fire Door must be kept closed at all times\'
When there was a fire
I had to jump out the window
Well, to open the door was forbidden - Doh!
I\'m the guy who
Always goes to the 99p shop
Cos the £1 shop is far too expensive
(1 penny more expensive each item
Noted for you non-UK poets) - Doh!
And I\'m the guy who
Is still looking for Bill Posters or Bill Stickers
(Not that million year old joke again! lol)
Cos they are gonna be prosecuted
Why? What have they done? - Doh!
And I\'m the guy
Who married KP
She hid the water from my whisky
Made me tipsy
Caused me to say \'I do\'
Or \'I will\' - marry ya - Doh!
I\'m the guy who
Has a talking dog, Fido
Who still checks your poems - and mine too
And barks at anyone - me included
Who \'forget\' to mark certain poems 18+. Doh!
I\'m the guy who
Says all these things are true - probably!
I inhabit Cuckoo Land
How do you get there? You ask me
Take the No.7 bus to the moon, then turn left
And it\'s the second rock on your right!
Heehee