in particular, (who did a wonderful job
sprucing up my unruly birds nest -
and tantamount to endangering
nearly the following pestilential species
that thrive in unkempt hair:
Human hair naturally
hosts a delicate microbiome,
but when left unwashed
and uncombed, conditions shift
to favor specific parasitic insects
and microorganisms, which primary inhabitants
that capitalize (true to Marxist philosophy)
proliferate within these environments include:
Head Lice (Pediculus humanus capitis):
Small, blood-sucking insects
that live on the scalp
and attach their eggs (nits)
to the hair shaft.
Despite the common myth,
lice do not actively prefer
unwashed or \"dirty\" hair;
they simply get drawn
to the warm blood supply of the host.
However, uncombed hair
such as mine before being cut
provided a sheltered,
undisturbed environment
for nits to incubate and multiply.
Fortunately and luckily that never happened.
Demodex Mites (Demodex folliculorum
and Demodex brevis):
Microscopic arachnids
that live inside the hair follicles
and sebaceous glands.
They feed on the sebum
(natural oils) produced
When hair not washed,
sebum accumulates,
creating a larger food source
that can trigger an overgrowth
of these mites.
Malassezia (Fungi):
A genus of naturally occurring yeast
that thrives on the oily secretions
of the human scalp.
If hair not washed, sebum
and sweat builds up, allowing
this fungus to proliferate
and contribute to dandruff
or seborrheic dermatitis.
Normal Scalp Microbiome (Bacteria):
Bacteria like Staphylococcus
and Cutibacterium normally exist
on human skin.
Unwashed hair, especially
when allowed to become
matted or tangled,
traps sweat and dead skin cells,
encouraging these bacteria
to multiply rapidly.
While some insects
like bedbugs or fleas
can occasionally crawl
through hair, only head lice
and Demodex mites
fully adapted to complete
their entire life cycles directly
on the human head.
My humble apology
for losing myself (without my religion)
to a rather gross scenario,
but hands of mine operate
with a mind all their own.
Long a staple of my
a bum-in-a-bull appearance videlicet
(which means \"namely,\"
\"that is to say,\" or \"as follows\")
long unruly hair of mine,
I credit thee for helping me
feel like a million bucks,
and more deadset to comply
with being more determined
than ever before in my life
practice healthy hygiene,
and maintain fashionable hairstyle,
which promises (to abide
until death do me part)
attention to grooming myself,
which behavior formerly from today
usually got shrugged off
and given the short shrift
as the days and weeks elapsed
after finally summoning courage
to entrust a skilled technician
whose small, medium and large
claim to fame lies within dextrous fingers
clasping scissors plus
a brush and/or comb
analogous to an individual
adroit within the science and art of topiary
the name of a person,
who sculpts hedgerows into animals
to be admired
such asTim Bushe:
A London architect
who gained fame
for trimming his neighbors\' hedges
into various animals,
including cats, elephants,
fish, hippos, and squirrels, such that
his work became
a recognized Google Maps landmark,
and also similar
to a resident named Bill Thurman
(who resides here at Highland Manor
with his Tuxedo cat
he named Corbin Andrew Thurman,
and prioritizes his smart
as a whip furry four legged feline)
but lacks ways and means
to hustle his amazingly graceful
while being wheel chair bound
and non-ambulatory
and much restricted with leaden arms
due to countless injuries
throughout his seventy plus years
where he mainly lived
within the states
of Florida, Georgia, Massachusetts, Kentucky,
Louisiana, Pennsylvania, and South Carolina
and honed a craft
incorporating trash (which
he pulls out from the dumpster) into treasure
yet being morbidly obese (linkedin to
aforementioned industrial accidents),
nevertheless assembles awesome
finished products that could probably
fetch quite a bundle of money courtesy
(think small fortune) if sold off at
the following Premier Auction Houses:
Christie\'s: The world\'s leading art business,
hosting high-profile live
and online auctions for historic,
modern, and contemporary masterpieces.
Sotheby\'s: Operating since 1744,
a premier destination
for fine art, luxury items,
and rare collectibles,
offering a robust online bidding interface.
Phillips: Specializing specifically
in 20th and 21st-century
contemporary art, design,
photographs, and editions.
Bonhams: A globally
renowned auction house
that handles both fine art
and a diverse range of collectibles,
from classic cars to Asian art.
Matthew Harris begs his and your pardon
if he overtaxed your noggin.