antra.coree

The Walls I Built

I gave the right parts of me to the wrong people.

 

Now I\'m afraid to give all of myself to anyone.

 

I trusted the wrong people.

I loved the wrong people.

I let them use me.

I let them crumble my heart and

steal my peace of mind.

 

And now...

Now I\'m scared of myself.

 

I\'m scared of the way I treat the people who genuinely care.

I hurt them without meaning to.

 

I\'m scared of being left alone.

I\'m scared that one more heartbreak will be the one I can\'t survive.

That I won\'t be able to stand back up.

 

So I built walls.

Walls so high that even I can\'t find my way out.

Walls so strong that when I need help the most,

I don\'t know how to ask for it...

 

I want to be loved.

To be cared for.

To be cherished.

To be understood.

To be comforted.

 

But whenever someone gets close enough to do those things...

 

I push them away.

 

Every single time.