Oh God, I tried.
The armor was forged in the quietest hours,
When tears fell like rain and dried into dust.
I waited for hands, like sun-starved flowers,
And learned that reliance is misplaced trust.
They looked at my stride and called it unbroken;
They heard my forced laughter and thought I was whole.
Not knowing the weight of the words left unspoken,
Or the silent erosion that hollowed my soul.
I reached out my hand, but it met only air,
While they praised the resilience they assumed was my core.
So I swallowed the scream and I swallowed despair,
And stopped looking back at the open door.
For it hurts twice as much when you’re standing in plain sight,
Drowning in plain view, while the world passes by—
Convinced that your armor is much too bright
For a crack in the spirit, a tear in the eye.
So I bit down my tongue and I learned how to mend,
To stitch up the wounds with nobody to see.
I stopped asking for help, coming near to the end,
When I realized nobody thought I needed it...
except me.