I watch the depressing overhead light flicker,
White and black, white and black, life or death.
And my fingers shake as my heart beats faster,
For it will take only a few short steps
To meet the decider of my fate.
I should run,
It wouldn’t be something new.
Sometimes, to run, is the bravest thing to do,
But that takes breaths-
of which I have very few.
I know not how soon I am to leave,
But I do know that I cannot stay.
The cursed hands of the clock will turn,
No matter how desperately I pray.
I almost smile.
I almost smile because the thing is,
Time is something I don’t really have,
But millionaires have lots to spare.
How I wish I were you,
How I wish I had time.
I almost smile imagining you,
Sitting next to me and complaining about your coffee.
I also imagine you sitting by my bed, laughing-crying,
Because what else can you even do?
What else can I even do?
I pray to live amongst you fools.
- Ria <3