Tristan Robert Lange

Pax Glugana

Don’t forget Caesar Popeyeus

For that won’t be very pious;

Sure, it’s true he’s not smart—

He thinks the moon’s his part—

But he still will glugify us.

Excerpt from Journal of Digital Archaeology, Vol. 87 (2163 CE): Recent excavations of a defunct poetry platform uncovered repeated references to an individual known only as \"Orchidee.” Evidence suggests he served as the court jester to Popeyeus, though some researchers argue he was, in fact, the emperor\'s chief theologian. One thing, however, is beyond dispute: he never owned gerbils nor hamsters...only pigs from Guinnea. Just ask him.

First published on tristanrobertlange.com, August 20, 2026.