A.N.

I\'m Just Living

I didn\'t write a poem today because today didn\'t have meaning.

 

I didn\'t read poetry
because it felt like I already had.

 

I felt still,
and unseen,
misunderstood,
but viewed.

 

I didn\'t want to write because I didn\'t have a unique metaphor,
and I didn\'t have a unique feeling.

 

I got in my head telling myself,

 

It\'s only good when it\'s first.
And it\'s only viewed as pretty when it\'s labeled original.

 

And I didn\'t try to take out my pen
and scribble words that couldn\'t be said.

 

I didn\'t try to breathe in
because I was sinking,
and breathing felt like it would only make it harder.

 

And trying to talk
would just give me a headache.

 

And I don\'t mean to write sad stories
or feel-bad-for-me poems.

 

But it seems that\'s what I do.

 

It seems I can\'t write happy
because happy can\'t be placed on one page.

 

Happy is many pages,
with many mountains
and valleys between them,
separating it too far
to seem pretty.

 

So I don\'t know how to say
I\'m happy.

 

I\'m just living.