Time Check!! 2:27 PM
The sound of heavy rain against the rusted roof grew louder with every downpour. I decided to put on my Bluetooth headset, listen to music, and lose myself in the endless scroll of social media.
Then…
I saw your profile.
“Time has changed so much for us,” I whispered to myself.
“Not long ago, we were once so close to each other.”
“Back then, you loved teasing me.”
And as the rain continued to pour, so did the memories—one by one, returning like they had only been waiting for the right moment to come back.
Memories I once wasted.
Memories I once chose to ignore.
They came rushing through my mind, bringing with them a bitterness I could no longer keep away. Slowly, my thoughts traveled back to those days I had deliberately pushed aside—days that meant nothing to me then, but somehow became the very things that hurt me now.
And in those few seconds of looking back, my mind became crowded with what ifs.
What if I had allowed myself to show you that I loved you too?
What if I had not let my pride come first?
What if I had given in instead of keeping everything buried inside me?
What if I had chosen to be happy with you?
What if I had fought against my fear and doubt?
Would we have continued fighting for what we felt until we reached this day?
What if…
What if you are still the one occupying my heart and mind even now?
If only I could turn back time.
Back to the days when I once knew what genuine happiness felt like, even when you constantly got on my nerves.
Back to the days when I could feel how much you valued me.
Back to the days when you waited for me, while I never had the courage to show you what I truly felt.
Back to the time I walked away for the sake of my own reasons.
I can vividly remember those days when you used to tease me. I would burst with anger while you laughed.
Did you know that I secretly loved the way you fought for my attention?
Did you know that I actually loved everything you did, even when I was already so annoyed?
I wanted to argue with you because, somehow, that was my way of showing interest in you.
Whenever I was with you, I was completely, undeniably myself.
And yet, I kept all of these thoughts buried inside me for all these years—
because of pride.
And here I am now, staring blankly at your picture.
Is staring at you all I have left?
Yes.
I suppose staring is all I can do now.
Because we are no longer connected.
And you are already happy…
…with someone else.
“So you suffer in regret after all,” I whispered to myself.
How long will it take before I finally learn to be honest with myself?
How long will I keep holding myself back?
How many more hours must pass before I learn how to stop regretting?
How long before I learn how to take a step away from this pain?
How do you stop wishing you had done things differently?
How do you stop regretting?
Teach me.
Please.
Teach me how to forget you.
Teach me how to forget the PAIN that I should have left behind with you on that day.
Teach me how to forget the DEEP WOUND left by this endless REGRET.
And teach me how to be true again—
to be true to myself.
To finally admit that all of this is nothing more than the consequence of a wrong decision I made yesterday.
2:27 PM…
The exact time.
The exact moment.
The exact moment when something happened that I never imagined I would come to regret until now.
If only time weren’t so playful.
I was the one who walked away.
And in the end,
I was the only one left regretting it.