I am fine
Really, I am...
Sitting here in this merciless humidity
Choking on the heat of the night
Every now and then I gasp for oxygen, as I am overcome by the feeling that something just isn\'t right
The memory of our laughter when we were together as one invades
An intruder
Taking me completely over for an instant
I do everything to stop myself from just getting in my car and driving illegally
Into an empty unknown
Searching for that feeling that I never had known until then
Hyperventilating like a fucking madman
My reasoning is all unclear
Then again, I am hiding
I see others feel my pain and begin to approach me
I cannot deal with anything trivial right now
All that I can think of is him
There are no solid reasons for why he and I lost each other so suddenly
It\'s too late now anyway
His cocaine-ridden, drunken confessions were probably best left unsaid
Visions of him dancing with his new little sugar plumb won\'t even budge, much less depart from my wounded head
Left alone
Left for dead
Too fractured to fall asleep in our bed
There is nothing that won\'t trigger it
It is crazy nonsense
Hence, my departure
I am fine ,though, most definitely...
I am just fine
Stockpiling up all of my liquor and my wine
The great ideas that can come to the minds of divinity
Days run through into tomorrows that become yesterdays
Merging to become a void filled with unknown particulars
The details were never meant to become so pertinent anyhow
Perhaps not knowing where the now stands upon my calendar is actually a strength that I should respect in high regard
Just as long as the cocktails and drugs keep coming around, and all the boys cocks stay ready and hard
\"Oh, waiter, I\'ll take another bubble o\' shard, por favor!??
I am fine, really, I am just fine...so, bring back the fucking bottle of wine, bitch!
Don\'t worry, I give you my word that I will try to hitch myself some other ride
It is \"Gay Pride\" weekend, after all...and, my karma hall awaits me....
6-25-2009