I wish that I could tame this vicious beast that lives within me
I am just so sick of being put last
When I fall, I fall fast and hard
When I love, I am relentless
There is no in between
No grey area
No holds barred
Perhaps that is why my body is so scarred
There is nothing I can do to change the way that I am
I have grown up quite a bit since the first time and the last time that I fell
I even have wished them all well with their new flings
It is hard to admit how hard that slap to the flesh stings me
I don\'t want to feel
I don\'t want to care
There is nothing wrong with being there
In the eye of the hurricane
To take control of the reigns
To be a lady but not a snobbish bitch is quite a contrast
Forgetting about the past only comes when there really has been a change in the now
It amazes me how few people know how their hearts work
I can\'t pick a topic and talk about random crap
I like to do everything on point
Straight forward
Full swing
no resting
No tip-toeing
No taking short cuts
No talking about what\'s going on with everyone other than ourselves
Gossip is an animal that has a pussy- not a cock
Idle chit-chat
Useless noise
Stories
Small talk
Poppycock
I want to learn how to truly live and let live
I want not to be jealous, envious, angry, cruel, or vain
I feel like I am being driven slowly insane sometimes
Then, suddenly my power kicks me into gear
Back in the saddle
In control again
Haunted am I by spirits of all shapes, sizes, genders, races, creeds
I make sure that my needs are met at all times
But, then I consider all of my spirit friends and I wonder if they are who come up with all of my random cravings
Hear my requests
Save my goals
Create my urges
Come up with my desires
My sensibility purges and perspires out all of the dramatics
The undertones that plague the crowd and torment the brain
That taunt us into wanting to kill bitches
Cutting open wounds that are dressed with the stitches that outwit time
Everything aforementioned are crimes that are punishable by law and enforcement upon them has been and is now and will be happening with much greater intensity in the future
I will be haunted one way or another forever
It is all about learning mutual respect and not going overboard with the use of my power
It can all devour you in the wink of an eye and there is no turning back then
It helps to remain true to yourself and be honest, proud, and rightfully true to only you
Haunted by a state of refined grace
Haunted more is the body that moves than the one who sits stationary in one place....
10/7/2016