It finally happened
I figured scratch that i knew this would happen
Although i wish it would not
But thats not how life works
After bottling things up and keeping everything to myself i finally broke down
I always feel like such a bother to people
I don\'t wish to burden them with my \"problems\" so i keep to myself
Also because I\'m not the best at putting my thoughts into words where others understand
This has always proved difficult for me
It was like any other day
I woke up, went to class, and came home
I helped mom cook and clean the kitchen up
Then it just happened
I was making lemonade and suddenly i felt water on my cheeks
I hadn\'t even known I was crying
She was in dismay
Not knowing what was wrong or how to console me
I tried talking to her for once
Not that i had a choice
But still i tried
She told me i need to talk to someone
A doctor. A psychiatrist.
She said you need to deal with this...
depression and anxiety.
I don\'t want you to take medication
I want you to learn to deal with it
I want you to get over it
Speechless. I was completely speechless and utterly disappointed at how cold she was towards it... towards me.
Ive never been one to depend on medication for resolution but to tell me to deal with it to get over it. How does one do this? How does one just stop being depressed and stop having anxiety?
Im not sure what sadden me more. That my mother thinks mental illness is something you can get over easily like a cold or that i finally allowed myself to publicly breakdown.