This place is a mess
I have really been down
I don\'t know exactly where I will be going
There will come a time when all of this will come to an end
We tried
Not hard enough, obviously
I came here in good faith that we could save this house
That it would remain a home
But the pangs of addiction were what took control of the motivation machine
The one that we had built
Custom made
Perfection that could never be bought
Now it could be, if we could ever put ourselves back into the shoes that we wore ten years ago
It is very sad to see it all go
I worry about my friend Karen, who I came here for
She has been avoiding us all for days on end
Only stopping in here and there to change clothes
A quick hello
She must be leaving her pitiful excuse for a man
Because he has been here the whole time whining
Just like his drunken mother who still resides in the sun room adjacent to mine
Not for much longer
Nobody could erase the debt that was already lingering back in May and worse, before, when they all lived here like cave people
Cooking spaghetti in the fireplace of the family room
No electricity
No water
No gas
You could see your breath in here
I dropped by a few times during that crazy stretch of time
To score something or other for my insistent twat of a roommate
My so called friend who wanted my soul for the use of her piece of shit old mini van
They at least had all of their heads together then
Screwed on straight
They were a family that now ceases to exist if it ever did
This is not at all how I had envisioned this to pan out
Everything so over-dramatized and really quite sad
So many good times have been had here
Yet, somehow the black seems to have won the fight
Maybe wrong
More likely, right on the money
It\'s not funny at all
It always wins, which effects me somehow, some way
It\'s not fucking fair!
I have never fucked with it, but I end up caring immensely for so many idiots who do
That nasty drug always wants to see to it that it puts me through an emotional Hell
Tears fall into the well in this place where the water no longer runs
Where the fun and games must all come to a screeching halt so that the light warriors here can again exalt back into our way of living....
11/25/2016