did you realize at the time
that your horrible decisions
would affect my life forever?
and change how i viewed the world?
i thought it was a safe happy place
but now it isn\'t anything more than
black nothingness.
did you realize at the time
that years later
thinking back to what you did
would bring me to the bathroom
with a razor blade in one hand
and a bottle of pills in the other
hoping the pain will end
wishing my heart would stop beating
because you were just the beginning.
the beginning of a long line
of abusive relationships
and nights of crying myself to sleep.