The last few days I have realized something
That
What I want
What I need
What I deserve
Are all three different things
Those three things
Don’t align at all
What I want is my drug
Something that I know is poison to me
But I crave so much
Even if it breaks me
Hurts me
Leaves me in pieces
I can’t stop craving it
And at the end of it all
I don’t even know if that is what I really want
What I need is
Answers
Stability
Respect
Understanding
A connection…
What I deserve
Someone that cherishes me and all I am worth
Someone that spoils me
Someone that will go to the end of the earth for me
To be happy
To be excepted for me and all my flaws
I look around
As the world doesn’t stop spinning
And I honestly don’t know
I don’t know what I want
I don’t know who I am
I know what people want from me
What they think is best for me
What they think I should be
What they think I should do
But
How do I know?
How do I find out what I WANT
What is right for ME
Will I ever figure it out?
Or will I go through life feeling lost
Hopeless
Hurt
Confused