Grnteabug

I Pretend

Hey, Jackie Chan

I’ve heard that before

Chino

That’s what my boss called me because

he couldn’t be bothered to learn my name.

Jet lee. Bruce lee, Mr.Miyagi

I’ve heard them all a thousand times and a thousand times again

 

I pretend I don’t hear the names

I pretend I don’t feel the stares

And I stuff it all down inside

So I don’t lash out

Because if I do,then they’ll say

“Oh he’s gonna do kung fu”

 

I pretend that I don’t get mad when they laugh about

What “my people” eat

And i pretend that it doesn’t irk me when

when the next day, that same food is on display in a magazine

And they ask “Where is the best place to get that in the city”

 

I pretend I don’t get offended when they crack jokes

About how my mom, my sister, my aunt

Are a danger on the road

I smile and walk away, when I talk to someone and they say

“I don’t date Asian guys”

I pretend it doesn’t bother me when the bro next to me

Talks about how “delicate and quiet” Asian women are

Like they’re some sort of flower, whose petals can be plucked

 

I pretend that It doesn’t bother me when

People say “Why can’t “_____” people be like the Asians?”

I wonder what do they mean by that?

Do they mean good at math? Do they mean unintimidating?

Or do they mean obedient?

 

Well I’m tired of pretending

Don’t use my skin to insult someone else’s

If I want to insult someone, I will use my own voice

To so many people my skin is all they see

An Asian, Chinese, Japanese or Korean it doesn’t matter

What matters to them is what I’m not

What I’m not to them is an American