Age old china ball tree (Age old=cliché)
Adolescent angry men (no tranquility)
One hundred year war (Shocking)
(Ideas over imagery)
Ageless China ball tree (Oops! 6 syllables)
Hungry adolescent men (better)
One hundred year war (War monger)
Aged China ball tree
Wheat, soy, rice abundant fields
Picnics in the shade
Yellow China ball
Giant turtle under your branch
I ride turtle\'s back
The mighty live oak (Cliche)
Last parking space of summer (be more subtle)
My truck rests in shade
Moss laden live oak
Search heat scorched parking spaces (alliteration)
My truck rests in shade
Moss laden live oak
Heat blistering parking lot (not tranquil)
My truck rests in shade (what\'s subtle about a truck)
Moss laden live oak
Warm air mirages ahead
Roadside respite shade
Fall ripe apple tree (Fall is not subtle, try harvest)
Robin fledglings leave the nest (not easily spoken)
Fat worms run to hide
Harvest ripe fruit tree (fruit tree is overused)
Full fledged Robins leave the nest (alliteration)
Fat worms run to hide
Harvest ripened fruit
Young fledglings learning to fly
Fat worms run to hide
Joy
Deep
Harvest
Augustus / Houston, TX / June 2017