I breathed in and I didn\'t feel a thing
When I cry I don\'t feel anyone
Even when his skin is against mine I don\'t feel anything
...It takes me an hour and a half to get ready
I change my outfit at least 10 times before I leave
I won\'t leave the house if I don\'t like my hair or my make up or myself
I flick the light switches on and off again before I leave the bathroom
I don\'t turn the lights in my bedroom on...ever
I think about everything I do at least twice
I think I cry at the small things
I think cry at the small things
I think I hyperventilate at the big things
I think I hyperventilate at the big things
I think I don\'t feel anything
I think I don\'t want to feel anything
I\'d rather be empty then do this
Everyday I wake up again and again
I edit myself into someone else
Tear away at my own skin hoping someone else is lying underneath
Someone better
Someone smarter
Someone who doesn\'t care if I am perfect or not
But even when I rip away at my skin
Bully myself to the bone
Torture myself into vulnerability
Think too much
And fix every mistake
I think I don\'t feel anything