SilverXball

Telling My Story

Trying to define happiness would be a waste of time

As no one can quite put a pin on the definition

Instead, what better way than to simply BE

BE happy, BE confident, BE independent

But, it\'s hard.

For some like me

expression is hard

So I write it instead.

 

 

I\'m fifteen years old

And severely depressed

I have to live every day

Like I\'m second best

 

I try so very hard

To get on with my life

But it\'s hard to keep on running

When my hand holds a knife

 

Sadness, depression

They swallow me whole

In my vision there\'s no colour

And world looks so dull

 

I can\'t believe I fooled myself

That I was happy for so long

And despite my looming stature

On the inside I\'m not strong

 

Encouraged by my fantasy

I have no real home

Can I ever stop searching?

Or forever will I roam?

 

I cannot even wish

To go back to happy times

I learned that all my past is lies

It seems the bells have lost their chimes

 

All the lovely families

Have me seething in hot rage

Maybe I can finally 

Rewrite the final page

 

I now believe I understand

How I can change my fate

I\'ll use illusions as my guide

To enrich my mental state