I saw her first......but now he has her...we\'ve talked about it before but how can I tell her what I\'ve really felt.....the only girl that\'s understood me is connected with another....I think to myself why didn\'t I, why couldn\'t I, what was stopping me.....was it the weakness in my knees, the aching in my bones, what a heartless man I\'ve become.....my first love lost to another all due to my own faults.....its getting even harder to process when she\'s near...... maybe she\'ll start to think I dislike her and back away.......but is that fair.......to someone I befriend for life....it hurts so much, so damn much......because i faltered and now look where I ended up......alone looking thru the window in admiration.......as my wounds grow of envy......she was mine and I failed to hold on.......but can I be happy for her.....I want to so bad I really do but i can\'t.......and that hurts more because she broke my heart......