love
i find your voice beautiful
even when you are screaming
i find your eyes perfection
when you refuse to look at me
i am scared to show true emotion
to someone feels so distant
every movement you make is beautiful in every way
you all i desire
i want you to feel the same passion as me
if you give me the stars
i will give you the rest of my universe
because nothing in this entire world
makes me feel as happy
and one moment i am falling apart and the next falling in love
and i pray that
my future will forever be with you
because my heart belongs to you
and whether or not
you choose to treat it right
is up to you
and i find it incredible
that i can look at you for just a second
and find one million things i love
and every time i look at you i fall deeper in love
and i could stay up all night saying all the things i find
just indescribably beautiful about you
the way my stomach turns when you whisper the word “what?’’
the way when my mind is a storm and i am a complete mess
you make me calm
you make me feel like the earth is untouchable
like the horrible things that happen aren’t so bad
and this feeling you give me confuses me
because one minute i am scream and the next
i am completely in love with you
and i get all too nervous to tell you these things
so i hope you know i care deeply about you
and you make me so happy
so i love you
and you are my whole universe
and you better me as a person
and you make the best of me show
you are so strong when i am weak
your kisses make me overwhelmed with happiness
and when my hand is holding yours i feel untouchable
from the temptation of this earth
the only words i can really say to you
is i love you
i love everything about you
crav·ing
i am a complete mess
my thoughts are scattered
my heart shattered
my body froze
i needed to think about my safety at that time
i wanted to live
but sometimes fighting to live
means not moving
not physically fighting
but knowing how to get out without scars too deep to heal
why can’t i get over the balme i have placed on myself
i know there’s nothing i could of done
but guilt attacks my movements
breathing is delayed
eyes water
lungs fill with fog
bricks weigh me down
life wasn’t suppose to get this rough
Anger
Anger is attacking me
i can’t seem to gather emotions
i am too far gone
am i a waste of emotion
should i end this feeling of pain?
it’s not even pain at this point
it’s deeper than surface
it’s this eternal battle
it’s this lack of control that fears me
gravity is lacking
my mind is floating
wandering to indescribable places
where shall my body take me?
where shall my anger rest?
when shall i find closure
can i find in someone?
something?
no!?
i have to find closure in myself?
i have to find closure in the mess of myself ?
how can i do that?
find peace in an event
an event that ripped apart my life
i can’t get over this