Why is my first reaction always anger?
Anger was the only emotion
that my parents ever expressed.
And I guess that’s why,
to this day,
I confuse anger, with love.
I learned from an early age
to swallow your protest
in exchange for their
peace of mind.
But it always lead right back to anger.
I kept so much of this emotion
tucked inside my chest,
that it changed me into someone
I no longer recognized.
Something I never meant to be.
Every time my father yelled at
me as a little girl
he engraved into my brain
that anger is the same thing as kindness.
But I grew up trusting men
who only hurt me.
Because they looked so much like him.
But I learned that anger is a secondary emotion.
Because there is some need that is not being met.
I learned that at some point
being angry is just another bad habit.
Like smoking you just
keep poisoning yourself
without even realizing it.
Anger is a sign that something
needs to change.
And only you have that power.
In order to move on,
you must understand why you felt
what you did.
And why you no longer need to feel it.
So close your eyes, and please understand
that you are still young.
And the universe is endless.
And somehow, everything will be okay.