A cat came to my house one day,
He looked too thin, he was a stray.
He seemed so sad out in the street.
I gave him some tuna to eat,
Then when he’d eaten a whole tin,
He seemed to think he should come in.
He darted through my open door,
Left mucky paw prints on the floor.
He looked round with a lordly stare,
Then settled in my comfy chair.
He looked at me as if to say,
“I live here now, I’m here to stay!”
Soon after that, another stray
Arrived at my front door one day.
His fur was sparse, his ears were torn,
He looked neglected and forlorn.
I felt I had to give him food;
To not feed him would have been rude.
I opened up a tin of fish,
And fed it to him, on a dish.
He fixed me with his catty grin,
Before I knew it, he’d moved in.
He gave a small, contented shrug,
And settled down upon the rug.
I think those two cats sent word round
About the soft touch they had found.
Loads of cats began to arrive,
They formed a queue along the drive,
And with a caterwauling din
Demanded that I let them in!
Now I must buy food in large vats
To feed all of those pampered cats.
They cost a small fortune to keep,
They won’t eat anything that’s cheap!
Those spoilt cats aren’t even grateful
For each tasty bowl and plateful.
They don’t respect me, it’s quite plain,
They treat me with haughty disdain.
They bring in half-dead birds and mice,
Which really is not very nice!
They sleep in cupboards, and in drawers,
My rugs are shredded by their claws.
The house is covered in cat hair,
Six cats sit upon every chair.
It seems there is no room for me,
My house is now a cattery.
They’ve even commandeered my bed -
I’ve had to move into the shed!