It feels like someone is literally tearing away my skin with bare hands
Reaching into my chest cavity
And forcefully trying to remove my heart from my chest
Without disconnecting the veins or arteries.
They are pulling so hard they are yanking on a chord connected to my brain
That is stuck on repeat
Playing old movies like a rundown theatre
I sit all alone in
Tied to a chair with my eyelids held open with toothpicks
Tears stream
unwelcomed
Uninvited
Probably from not being able to close my eyes.
Tortured to watch these sappy ass movies that I am the star of.
I watch all the happiest moments and then the torturer replays how I ruined them all.
Shows me how it\'s all my fault.
Anyone watching would look at me in disgust.
If their was anyone else in this dark, eerie, theatre.
If I wasn\'t alone.
Again
My body is suffering a pain I tried so hard to avoid.
The last time I told myself I\'ll pay more attention to strangers.
I won\'t let them kidnap me and leave me for dead
Or worse torture me
After they have gotten all the use they could out of me.
They are criminals lurking in the dark,
Waiting on innocent prey
Looking for a girl like me
Broken
Easy
They rob me of all my dignity
Self worth
Pride
And if that\'s not enough
They insist on trying to steal my heart.
But I clutch on to it tightly
It\'s the one thing I try to hold onto
Sometimes I wish I would\'ve just let them take it.
Then I wouldn\'t be here in this pain
Feeling the tugging pull from my vein
Of them still trying to rip my heart out of my chest
Making sure they take the last part of me that keeps me alive.
Fuck it I\'ll give it to them
Anything to end this
So they settle for a portion
Like the ones before them
Piece by piece I give it all away
So I can go back to being numb inside.
They release me from the shackles
I\'m free again.
I\'m safe from being robbed because I dont have the one organ that makes me vulnerable prey.
I now become the criminal
Lurking the nights
Looking for a beating heart to steal.
My turn to be the one who is in control of the way I feel.