I am witness to my own death
With my gravestone tattooed to my chest
I may look
And feel alive
But there is no one home
I take pills to rise
And pills to rest
Pills to fight nightmares
And pills to no longer be afraid
I wash them down with courage
No longer able to feel the slightest
I rise to a fog
A cloud of grey
That hides my history
That hides my pain
I cannot remember happiness
But I also cannot remember the car wreck that brought me
to today
Which brings the question
Is the curtain worth forgetting the pain?
I look upon my families eyes
And ask what times have I forgot
Just numb the pain
My funeral has already came
And gone long ago
I do not have to be dead to have a funeral
just shade my brain in darkness
And forgot the path that brought me here
Now these medications
Are a wall that keeps the flood away
For if they hit me now
I will surely be washed away
And there will be nothing to numb
And nothing to hide away
So kill me softly
And not with countless nerve endings, shooting with pain
Slowly may I go
But in my mind no one will remember this day
Nor remember my name