It’s so quiet.
I’ve never noticed how quiet it was.
It’s almost strange to think that just hours ago, this emptiness had been filled with feelings
feelings that don’t even matter anymore.
There’s water running.
As I watch the water stream, I think,
I think it’s strange.
That while I sit here thinking all these thoughts that won’t matter soon, you’re probably somewhere far from here right now.
Probably somewhere far, laughing.
So happy.
How can you be happy while I’m hurting?
My head hurts.
Somewhere, in the room, the sound of a cap being popped off a bottle could be heard
Is that me?
What am I doing?
gulping and sobbing sounds could be heard
What am I doing?
glass breaking
There’s a strange feeling running down my arm
I wonder what it is.
I don’t care.
Forget it.
I’m so tired, I don’t even want to think anymore.
It doesn’t matter
you run your arms alongside the smooth porcelain closing you in
It’s so cold in here, I wonder if you’ve ever felt this way.
you shiver
Was the water always this color?
there’s a coldness in the room
Was my skin always this color?
you run your fingers along the bumps of your arm
I feel pain.
I wonder if you’ve felt pain like this.
you dig your fingernail into one of the lines
It hurts.
Like the feelings I felt yesterday.
Everything had crumbled down.
My head is spinning.
I can barely think straight.
drip
There’s something running down my face.
you put a hand to your face
Is that me?
you feel the trickles, running down your face
Are those my tears?
you drop your hand
I think I’m going crazy.
a hysterical laugh escapes your lips
Crazy.
you repeat the word over and over again in your mind
Crazy.
drip
guess that’s all I’ll ever be.
Crazy.
Like when I found you
When you were so broken.
Crazy.
When these feelings developed
So slowly.
I didn\'t even notice them sneaking up.
Crazy.
Like how I felt
When you told me the truth.
you shiver and look into the water, mesmerized
I wonder when the water turned this color.
drip
So pretty.
So painful.
drip
The pain carved.
When you told me
you didn’t love me.
drip
your eyes are drooping
I’m sorry.
Crazy.
Crazy crazy crazy.
The water is a deep red now.
Crazy crazy crazy crazy.
I can’t focus anymore.
Crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy.
I’m sorry.
Crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy.
I’m sorry.
Crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy.
I’m sorry.
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