Depression is the most craziest thing that has ever happened to me. Sometimes I don\'t feel like a real person, I feel like I\'m driving in automatic. I don\'t get a say in what\'s going on in my own life but I can see everything that\'s happening with a constant lump in my throat. My soul is screaming in pain, it doesn\'t stop. Never. Not even when I\'m smiling. I want to be isolated. I don\'t want people to see how I\'m feeling. So I try to put on an act. An act of being busy but not doing anything. An act on being happy around people but crying inside. I can\'t sleep, I lie there and think of how messed up I am. My head and heart ache in the shell of a person I am. In the shell of a person I\'ve become. Despite the years of help I\'ve had, and the medication that\'s meant to soothe the pain. I feel worse every day. My world is crumbling around me. But I will be ok. One day.