Anna Marg

War

And the time comes that you have to make a decision

You\'re in that situation that there\'s a cliff up ahead and a river behind

And you gotta choose

Are you gonna jump or are you gonna drown

And it\'s a fight or flight situation

But you can\'t flight

Not when everyone is fighting with all their might

Not when everyone is keeping up knowing their lives hang from a thin line

Knowing what you\'re here for

What you\'re fighting for

Who you\'re fighting for

So you pull that trigger and you can never go back

To the person you were

To the person they had you for

To the person you wish you could still be

And the nightmares begin

All the voices

All the screams

All the pleading eyes

All the questions why

And all you can do is cry silently

Cause you have no answer

There\'s not a logical explanation or conclusion

Cause this

This is war

And it\'s ripping souls bare without asking

Not only the souls of the ones lying dead on the cold uninviting ground

But also the ones from those who will survive

Those who will make it back in one piece

Only that\'s completely a lie

Cause that one piece isn\'t intact anymore

It has scratches and bruises and little fragments start to fall apart

For what is seen can\'t be unseen

What is heard can\'t be unheard

What is done can\'t be undone

And no one can make that little monster living inside quiet down

No one can take away that unsettling feeling that you committed one of the most fatal sins

That you took a persons\' life

And not only one, many

But you had no choice

And even though you know it

Even though no one can or will blame you for what you did

Deep inside you still feel that that\'s just a pretty facade

Cause no one pressed you to pull that trigger

Or throw that grenade

Or put that bomb

Or be part of that war

But how could you sit in your little home calmly

When people are fighting for their country

When people are volunteering to take that burden of you

To keep you safe

You couldn\'t have that

And now what you can only do anymore is pray

Pray for that war to be over

Pray for no more losses

Pray for no more tears

Pray for those demons haunting you to go away

Pray for everything to go blank and find piece of mind again

Even if it\'s just for a day or just for the night or just for a moment

So you can just feel like you\'re you again

That naive little boy locked into his perfect world

Into his bubble of happiness

Away from the big bad world

For you no longer can

And you smile wistfully when a quote from a movie you once watched comes to mind..

\'\'War does not determine who is right... only who is left...\'\'