i used to think suicide was a permanent solution to a temporary problem. that was before i felt like this. that was before i cried myself to sleep most nights. that was before i felt like i was letting everyone down. before i was a disappointment. that was before i realized that my father must hate me. that my stepmom hates me. that my best friend must hate me. all of them must hate me to treat me like dirt. to lie to me. to disregard my feelings so much. to put themselves above me every single time. and then turn it around on me. i’m the horrible friend i’m the terrible daughter. i’m the problem. but this isn’t a temporary problem. i’m the problem clearly. that’s not temporary. that’s forever. so why not end it now? why wait? i could just end it tonight. no one would care. no one loves me. no one truly cares about me. mum works so much she doesn’t see me so she couldn’t truly miss me. my best friend doesn\'t even care about me. my dad probably wouldn’t know that i was gone. no one would care enough. no one does care enough for me to stay for them. why shouldn’t i just kill myself? what do i have to live for? i don’t see anyone who cares enough to even know anything’s wrong. sometimes no matter how hard we try, no matter how much we want it ... some stories just don’t have a happy ending.