Jo Middleton

Śūnyatā

I\'ve been mollycoddled in darkness for 48 hours
To sit in sun is to sit like the hare in car lights
Every muscle I can feel, Stiffen under public view
And to not fully remember the walk I took
Was it woven in my DNA?
 To hurt and bleed the narcissi?
Must be just because I\'m the freak
To zone out from the view sliding by me
What if he doesn\'t even want to look at me?
All this effort for disappointment and glances
I didn\'t see a point in getting up this morning
Pretending I\'m normal but there\'s mist all around me
I\'m confused to how to I\'ve got here
Did I say that already? Oh dear sorry.
If you touch me I might scream
Fall into corners and protect my face from danger
I\'m sorry I failed you once again
War songs blasting in my head
If I had done it already I would have been dead
Found me wrapped up, the fog has disappeared
Just me and myself on cloud 12 again
I always seem to disappoint, So quickly and so swiftly
I\'m not even trying anymore!
I guess it just comes naturally to me
If I can\'t have you is it ok if I steal a petal ?
I promise to look after it
Forever and ever
Oh look 10 minutes passed by I hadn\'t noticed
I\'m as dead to the world as God is to the atheist