Let’s see
Who is the real me?
Is the face I’m wearing today a mask?
Or the real thing?
I know I have this flesh
And it’s disgusting
So all the things it lusts for
Try to creep into my inner being
Then I try to start surrendering things
In the hopes that I’ll stay clean
Wait, wait... get clean
Can I even do that?
There goes another thought
I shouldn’t think like that
Oops there slipped another word
I shouldn’t speak like that
Read another book
And listen to this pastor see
Maybe one day you can be “taught “ how to be free
But wait, doesn’t the Bible make it seem easy
Just love people
And serve the needy
Believe and know that Jesus saved me
Then just walk in the light like it’s nothing
Sure thing, sounds grand
But there’s still a few things I don’t understand
Oh wait, I forgot longsuffering
You know the stuff that’s supposed to be defining
So here it goes again the questions in my head
Tossing fire back and forth
Feel like I can’t share things
Not many think like me
I can already sense they wouldn’t receive it
So should I even believe it
I see both sides of every fence
And neithers grass is greener
But I know that at the end of ones side there’s a pasture
And the other way is just torture and disaster
So I just make my choices
to the best of my ability
Who knows if I’ll ever figure out the real me
I’ll just keep praying and hoping
And believing In what I can’t see
That’s the only thing that makes any sense to me
The only thing that gives my soul and spirit a sense of security
Thank Goodness I have a God that loves me enough to wait patiently
I’m going to have to let you go now
Because I have a lot to figure out about me.