I’m far too busy to write a poem today.
The garden needs a tidy
Your sister is away
If I write a poem it’ll take all bloody day.
Mum’s got an appointment
at the salon later on
then to the doctors
to get a new hip on.
The car needs an MOT
in Chesterfield of course
I’ve got to pop out and find
some excrement from a horse.
For the garden to flourish
I must spread it all around
add it to some gravel
to hide the filthy ground
I must clean the kitchen
and wipe the bathroom tiles
vacuum in the living room
and re-arrange my files.
The windows, they need cleaning
our boots are smothered in mud
I went to start the van,
and the battery is a dud.
Get the van to the garage
get the groceries on the shelves
get the underpants ironed
I need to employ some elves.
I’m so bloody busy,
I’ve got not time to think,
I need to get a job,
or maybe have a drink!
Dammit there’s no whisky,
I need to write a list,
I’m off to the shop right now,
so later I’ll be pissed.
I’ve got no time for poetry,
don’t you know that I’m emeritus?
I need a bloody holiday,
before He comes to ferret us....
away.
No wait....mum needs a cup of tea
a hot chocolate, a cuddle,
she wants the bit of newspaper
you’ve started to un-muddle.
Look, someone’s left a load of cake
sat lonely and forgot.
Now I’ve got to find the time to eat the bloody lot.
So, I’ve got no time for poetry,
in fact I’ve got to go,
this shouldn’t be the last line
but..............