queer-with-a-pen

V

you were my first kiss

and you made my

bottom lip bleed

 

and i remember thinking

standing inside the tornado

that was my bedroom

you must be a vampire

and my god

i want to marry you

 

do you remember when

we stopped talking for the

first time and i told you

to come find me when we

were both done being stupid kids

and i would get you a ring?

 

my heart isn’t sure

if that offer still stands

too busy working on

fixing all the chunks

you ripped out

 

but i could never stay

mad at you

and i think you know that

i just love you too much

 

but you won’t ever love me

the way that i love you

with the “IN” before the “L”

 

so i keep writing you

shitty poems that i may not

ever let you read

and the words act as

band-aids for all those little

tiny wounds that i keep

on coming back for

 

because someday

my heart and i will be able

to let go of you

but today is not that day