Sometimes I feel sad or mad or angry or loathsome or spiteful. Sometimes I doubt my own ability to feel anything outside those emotions. Sometimes when I feel it you won’t even know. Sometimes it seems like I’m just ready to go. Sometimes you’re annoyed like “why did I even invite him to come?” Sometimes your mad and make me feel dumb for even attempting to try and socialize so that maybe I can justify being alive. And then there’s her. She makes me feel alive and realize that those aren’t the only things that exist inside. Now instead I don’t hide my emotions I wear them with pride. Man, am I glad to be alive. Wait no she can’t be leaving. She can’t be gone these feelings are even worse. Someone just needs to put me in a hearse and bury me in the ground head first. Maybe then I’ll have a reason to be this out of breath. Maybe then I won’t feel like death. Maybe then I can go back to those basic emotions instead of all this emptiness and regret. Sometimes I wish we had never met.