Jim Yates

A Lament from the City of Love

A Lament from the City of Love

 

I thought she’d let me down,

But I was mistaken

As I’ve often been before.

At the time is seemed so serious,

So earth-shattering –

In hindsight,           

It was such a silly, petty thing.

I thought we’d make up

As good friends do,

As we always did

But Fate decreed

It was not to be.

It had me on my knees,

Regretting each breath I took

Every time I rose to my feet,

The pain of loss sunk me again.

Fate had cast its dye –

Nothing would ever be the same again.

Now I’m sad and down,

An emotional wreck –

An empty shell,

A down-and-out

In the City of Love.

 

Now she is gone, gone

I’ve lost her, I’ve lost her.

I’ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

It was always a good friendship

The best

Full of laughter and verve,

We could tell each other everything –

The most intimate or personal of things

And know it would remain a secret forever.

There was an unbreakable bond between us.

We trusted each other,

Our lives were safe in each other’s hands.

We were friends for life.

We could laugh and cry at ourselves

At all the absurdities of life

At our failures and successes

At our dreams and schemes

At the absolute fragility of life.

And how we could laugh,

And crease up in hysterics

Like two kids, having fun.

How we enjoyed the each other’s company

And the pleasure it brought –

The delight of just being together.

 

Now she is gone, gone

I’ve lost her, I’ve lost her.

I’ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

When she was down,

I‘d lift her up

When I was in a dark place,

She would lighten my weight.

When she cried,

I’d hold her tight and dry her tears.

When my heart ached,

As it often did,

She knew the cure.

When she needed support,

She could lean on me.

When I needed advice,

She gave it well

When my sorrows came,

She soothed them away

When she needed space,

I knew when to leave

When I needed sanctuary

To her I would go. 

 

Now she is gone, gone

I’ve lost her, I’ve lost her.

I’ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

She was my cultural guru

Who touched every part of my being?

Who gave richness to my life,

With her informative mind?

And exotic gifts

And treasures of every kind.

She showed me a different kind of beauty

One of eastern promise and delight

Full of exquisite delicacies

And subtleties of the mind

In return,

I’d take on a cultural tour

Through the tangled mind of an Englishman

Lost in his dreams.

She would laugh aloud

At such an absurdity –

How can a country,

That forever speaks in riddles

Have any credible culture,

She would say

And I’d laugh at her impertinence

But admire her all the same.

 

But now she is gone, gone.

I’ve lost her, I lost her.

I‘ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

Now, as I walk these well worn streets of Paris

I see her beautiful oval face everywhere

A face I’d cradled many times.

Her dark eyes follow me,

Eyes I would have died for.

I see her walking in the Jarden du Plantes

With her nonchalant air.

I see her in the Jardin du Luxembourg

As the sun glistens through the leaves

Or at Parc Monceau on a soft winter’s day,

Her dark hair blowing in the breeze.

I see her at Gare du Nord catching her train home

Waving me adieu with her joyous air.

I see her everywhere, in every window,

Every door, smiling at me.

When I close my eyes she is there

When I wake her eyes welcome me.

In my dreams she is there

Her musical voice calling me

Whispering the poetry of life

The poetry of love.

 

But now, she is gone, gone.

I’ve lost her, I’ve lost her.

I‘ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

As the sun sets

And the city lights sparkle

And the moon

With our dreams drift by

I feel more lost than ever before

More lonely than lonely can be.

In this city of all cities

Where love blooms

Where no man should lose a woman

I lost mine.

Oh, how cruel fate and life can be

To take away my precious dream.

To take away a faithful friend

And leave me an empty shell,

A soulless shadow, forever doomed

To wander the boulevards of despair,

To walk the avenues of sad reflection,

To crawl the rugged rues of regret

In a place of no return. 

 

But now, she is gone, gone.

I’ve lost her, I’ve lost her.

I‘ve lost her forever,

I lost her in the beautiful City of Love.

 

Mon Dieu, Mon Dieu,

Why should it be

That I must suffer this ignominy

Mon Dieu, Mon Dieu

I’ve lost it all

I’ve lost my way

I’ve lost my soul.

Mon Dieu, Mon Dieu,

Can’t you feel my pain?

Can’t you hear me cry?

Can’t you see my tears?

Mon Dieu, Mon Dieu,

She is gone

Gone forever

I’ve  lost her, I’ve lost her,

Mon Dieu

I’ve lost her forever,

I’ve lost her

I’ve lost her

I lost my dream in your beautiful City of Love.