Hood.

Shade (co-write by Hood & Candlewitch)

Tick-tock…


…innocent as
a calf at slaughter,
was your way
of presentation.


you trailed me
within my shadow,
so I would
hardly notice you.


but everywhere
I went you followed,
like some stalker
tag-along.


days came
nights went,
ever so slowly
like liquid ooze.

 

The shade of my shadow

Darkens in the streetlight glow

Stalks me; hunts me

Follows every bloodied footstep I go

 

The shade of my shadow

Blackens in the moonlight flow

Tracks me; haunts me

Follows every crimson footprint I go


I felt the sting
of transformation,
as year followed
repitious year.


gradually changes marred
my smooth fair skin,
cigarettes & booze
have left me altered.


the ravages
clearly show,
even after
reforming my reckless ways.

 

ever are you silently there
when screamingly,
I confront you

with defiant eyes.


with my frustrated
piercing cry,
the only sound
you make is...

 

…tick tock! Tick-tock!

Comments9

  • Kat

    Tick - tock the clock strikes no more. As somebody must lay dead on the floor! The stalking of you two, will leave very few!! Nicely blended into one!!

    • Hood.

      Kat,

      thanks for the read & comment. We have a few co-writes to post over the next few days.

      Glad you felt this one blended into one.

      regards

      Hood.

    • BRIANSODES

      TEMPUS FUGIT ~ Friend ~ and none of us can escape its ravages. In the dark descriptiveness of your poetry Candlewitch and yourself are symbiotic ~ just as SANTI and I are. I am pleased with our collaborations which are more sugary ~ as befits our age and optimistic stage in life ! But we have taken heed of your poem. Personally I like FUSIONS and Collaboration Poems because they add another dimension to MPS which has all the makings of a "GOOD POETRY SITE !" Your excellent poem is a seamless garment Thanks for sharing and scaring ! Yours BRIAN. Please check our Collaboration "Seasons of Love" TANKAS ~ Thanks S & B

      • Hood.

        Brian,

        thank you for the positive comment. Co-writes does add an extra dimension to a poetry forum. Let's hope other poets form alliances too.

        I shall indeed check out your latest collaboration with Santi.

        Thanks again,

        Hood.

      • Mugsdaddy

        You two are a prefect fit. Couldn't find a a single ripple, smooth as glass you are.
        Mugsdaddy

        • Hood.

          Mugs,

          thanks for the read & comment; Cat & I have known & written with each other for several years now so we are a good fit as we understand each other.

          Both warped! LOL!

          Hood.

          • Mugsdaddy

            You're warped she has curves.

          • 1 more comment

          • Candlewitch

            dear Hood,

            the lines you have added to this "bare bones poem" have given it a deeper dimension. I am honored and pleased to be part of this collaboration. thank you so very much for joining with me on this poem...your style is so complimentary to mine :)

            ever, eddy
            *hugs, Cat

            • Hood.

              Sis,

              your poem was strong enough on its own but it was still a pleasure & an honour to be able to add my own style to it also!

              We are like Siamese...which oddly is the title of tomorrow's collaboration!

              Hood.

            • Santita

              Your guys' writings flow so well together, this was seamless, while still being able to distinguish each of your unique styles! I look forward to the pieces you will continue to post in the coming days!

              • Hood.

                Santi,

                the issue with co-writes is combining two different writing styles but still making it read as one piece & ensuring readability & seamlessness - we tried!

                Hood.

              • FredPeyer

                This is so well written! But I want to know: Which one of you now has that pace-maker?

                • Hood.

                  FP,

                  appreciate the comment my friend.

                  The pace-maker...well we never tell our secrets!!

                  Hood.

                • James Michael

                  tick tock! Tick tock! goes the clock. Well done yous! Luking fourwerd to mani mre. Told you I was unajakated! ๐Ÿ˜œ

                  • Hood.

                    Lawless,

                    you been drinking?

                    LOL!

                    Hood.

                    • James Michael

                      Of course, always!!! ๐Ÿ˜œ

                    • 3 more comments

                    • myself and me

                      The original piece was a good read. With Hood's rewrite, the format is neater, and the whole poem is richer.
                      Perfectly done.

                      • James Michael

                        Yep, very well put together, I agree!

                        • Hood.

                          m&m,

                          I agree the original was a good read; I personally loved that version. Whether my addition was even needed I am not sure but Sis asked & I couldn't let her down!

                          Thank you for taking time to evaluate both versions & give comment.

                          regards

                          Hood.

                        • Accidental Poet

                          Very clever the way you weave time into this write. 2 thumbs up for two great poets. ; )

                          • Hood.

                            AP,

                            Cat & I both appreciate you taking time to read & comment.

                            We appreciate it! Thank you.

                            Hood.

                            • Hood.

                              AP,

                              Cat & I both appreciate you taking time to read & comment.

                              We appreciate it! Thank you.

                              Hood.



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